I am feeling much better today. I have to remind myself that I chose to forgive him so I cant keep dwelling over it too much. I still don’t think he is sorry though. I really don’t know what to think. I don’t even know who he is when I look at him. I want to believe that he will change and things will get better. It’s about to be a new year and if I really want to forgive him I can’t bring this along with us. I just have to let this go for our marriage, he is my best friend after all. I just don’t understand how you can tell another woman you love her and want to be with her. All while telling your wife that you want to spend the rest of your days together. It just doesn’t make any sense to me. I honestly don’t think I will ever understand why he did it. We will get through it though and become stronger. I love him with all of me so the hurt won’t just go away but we can try our best.